I'm gonna fly like an Eagle? (Guest Blog - Jackie)

First off, let me say that I everytime I fly the American Eagle puddle jumper from DC to Boston, it's as if the travel gods take all frustrations out on me.

My first AE experience included this crazy flight attendant who I SWEAR was fired by the airline right before this flight. She was slamming things in the galley, spilling drinks all over the place, and had locked the bathroom because it was broken (ok, this is not technically her fault), but I ask you, is it even legal to fly a plane with a broken toilet?! Regardless, this first round with AE was enough to make me vow never to take them again.... until, that is, US Air decided to price gouge.

So.. enter my second experience... I head to DCA (Ronald Reagan airport) last night around 5pm (flying Sunday night b/c of multiple morning meetings today). I check in for my flight and am told by the automatic machine that I need to speak with a gate agent for a seat assignment (not unheard of). When I get to the gate agent I'm told they "appear to me in an oversold situation... and they will be asking for volunteers to give up a seat and, only then, they MAY have room for me. Well.. after 6 loudspeaker attempts to get 2 people to give up their seat to Boston, I'm called up to the podium. Thinking I'm being called up to pick up my new boarding pass, I'm STOKED... this, however, was not the case.

Things play out as such:

AE Guy: So... we're not getting people to volunteer, and you're the last one to book this flight (5 days in advance, but whatever). We're going to have to bump you unless you volunteer.

Me: What does this mean?.... do you mean that if I volunteer to give up a seat I TECHNICALLY do not yet have, I get the $200 voucher?

AE Guy: If I bump you, it's $100, if you volunteer, it's $200.

Me: What flights do you have to get me out of here?

AE Guy: Do you live here?

Me: Yes

AE Guy: 8:05am tomorrow?

Me: Uhm... no, I have morning meetings which is why I planned on flying tonight in the first place...

AE: Guy: 10:10am, 3pm, 6pm, 7:15pm, but you connect at LaGuardia...

Me: No connecting. Let me make a call and I'll be right back. *** I call my manager and leave, on his VM, my plan to fly Monday night ***

Me: OK

AE Guy - let's do it. Book me on the 6pm tomorrow night..... and.... who's paying for my parking

AE Guy: ***shakes head to indicate no***

Me: I sure as shit don't think I should have to pay for my parking (yes, verbatim)

AE Guy: How about this... I'll give you $250 in vouchers and $10 meal ticket for the airport - that should cover your $10 in parking

Me: Done.

Post signing away on the voucher and what not, I have this brilliant plan that I will grab some food at the airport and take it home with me to enjoy while watching the Oscars. As you know, however, airport food is less than awesome. I wasn't in the mood to sit down and a have a meal at the airport (hello, I had Oscar fashions to view), so I hop in line at the fail safe "Panda Express." Don't act like you don't also love their Orange Chicken. It's delicious. Anyway, so my total is $9.85, and I had the woman my shiny, new, $10 food voucher.

Things go as such:

PE Lady: You can't use this here, it's good for this airport only.

Me: I know... I just got it at the American Airlines counter...

PE Lady: No, you can't use it here. You can use it in Jacksonville only.

Me: Jacksonville?! I JUST got this voucher here! Why Jacksonville?P

E Lady: Because that's what it says, Jacksonville.

Me: WHERE DOES IT SAY JACKSONVILLE?!?!

PE Lady: Right here ***pointing at text on the voucher***

Me: That says "JACQUELINE"... it's my name

Man in Line: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA

PE Lady: Where does it say Washington?!!?*** I scan the crap out of this voucher and find it... it's SO small***

Me: Right there...P

E Lady: Oh.

So... in short, I hate American Eagle and would advise no one to fly them.