Those of you who know me know that I travel a lot for my job. I have come to be an expert (self-named, of course) in airport layouts. I'm certain that whoever designed most of the airports in the US has never actually packed a bag. Or been ON a plane. Actually, I'm going to include London's Heathrow airport in that category too. Let's discuss:
1. Airport Bathrooms - The only way you can use an airport restroom is to use the handicapped stall. Since I'm not actually handicapped, I usually feel really guilty when doing this. However, anyone who has ever tried to use a regular (is that wrong to call non-handicapped stuff 'regular'? that seems mean) stall knows that it's physically impossible to carry in a laptop bag AND a rolling suitcase AND yourself. And I'm not particularly obese either, I can't imagine how anyone larger than me would ever be able to get in there and close the door! So I usually end up leaving my rolling bag outside the door (just sitting there waiting to be stolen) and that frees up a little room. Now, I have never used a men's room, but I hear that it's much more disgusting because you basically have to leave all your stuff on the floor right next to the urinal where there is pee splashing all over the place. And your bag is now soaked in pee. Also disgusting. Why can't they just make the stalls bigger? Or have a shelf you can put your stuff on when using the urinal? Or some kind of splash guard? Anyway this is gross and I'm done discussing it.
2. Airport Food Options - Appalling. SFO has good food, but I think it's because our airport is usually totally full of Asian tourists and they dont eat pizza and Subway (from what I can tell, at least). I'm usually running kind of late to the airport and run through security and then find out that my food options include greasy pizza, a disgusting pre-made sandwich wrapped in saran wrap (and I'm sorry - but who buys pre-made egg salad that's all squished up through the saran? sick), and other gross options. Ok sometimes there's also a Chili's Too, which in this situation would be my 1st choice. But they're not very fast, so that's sometimes not an option. So i'm embarassed to say that in this case (meaning....twice a week) I usually buy a bottle of water and a large (bc they always offer to upsell you, and i always say yes) Bud Light and consider that my dinner. And now I understand why I cannot lose weight. Oh well. And I think that selling your customers those little snack boxes is seriously gross.
3. Magazines - I usually buy a few magazines before my flight. Yes, I read real books too. But on my ~6 hour plane rides (twice a week) sometimes you just want to veg. And i love trashy magazines, so sue me. So I can get away with watching movie or tv shows on my computer for about 2 hours until the battery dies (assuming i dont have real work to do, which i usually do). then i sometimes watch the in-flight movie (but i absolutely cannot watch freaking "gridiron gang" anymore, and that's all they're showing on united these days), then i read, then i want trashy magazines. So i have purchased them in advance for this very moment. BUT...you can read Us Weekly in about 30 minutes (less if you just look at the pics like some people i know....). Then i'm always hit with guilt...like, i cannot believe i just spent $4.00 for this. Even worse if you've been tricked into buying multiple (ie - USW, In Touch, Star, OK, etc). Because they all have the same pictures. So it's kind of a waste. Not saying I haven't done it, but it's a waste. So I usually offer them to women sitting around me (this isn't sexist, but men usually dont want them...). Then i just shove them in the seat back pocket for some lucky person to find on the next flight. BUT....there should be a magazine exchange program (they have this for books....but who can seriously finish a whole book then comes back to the airport to return it for 50% of the price!??!). I would totally do that for magazines. Can we start this program?
*disclaimer - I recognize that most airports (and most planes, for that matter) were designed and built long before any of the current security measures were put into effect. That would explain some of the inconveniences I mentioned above. However, every airport I go through is having expansions, renovations, etc...how can they not fix these things? Weird.
Ok that's all my commentary for now. More to come. Leave comments!!
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7 comments:
Your first post! How exciting. Welcome to the blogging world, where your thoughts float around to god knows who, god knows where. Love you!!
wait, i TOTALLY leave my magazines in the pocket for the next traveller to read for free too!
although i have a sneaking suspicion that the stewardesses go through all of the pockets when you land to rid the plane of all possible entertainment. that way you actually consider paying 5 bucks to watch gridiron gang AGAIN.
what are your thoughts on DVD rentals in airports? i say it's a crock.
p.s. I also always fall prey to the LARGE beer option.
Congratulations on your first blog post! Whee! I can't wait to hear more about what you have to say about the world.
Kick ass first post, keep 'em coming!
Thanks for creating a new "book" for me to read! I have always loved your sense of humor~
Congrats on the new blog. My job just happens to be writing about airports, and I'm always interested in blogs like yours, because you are the people that actually use the airports. Without you, there'd be no airport business.
On the bathroom stalls, the new Terminal A at Boston Logan got it right. All the bathrooms have stalls that are big enough for you and your luggage. And you're seeing this at other airports that are building new terminals.
I also leave my magazines in the seat pocket for someone else to enjoy.
SFO is one of the best airports in the world for food choices, especially in the International terminal. And the Zoom iPod/electronics machines are at SFO, Atlanta, Reno and Indianapolis so far, but they are adding all the time.
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